Hello there blogosphere… been awhile since I posted!
What’s that you say? Did I lose my motivation? Why no, actually, I’ve been extremely motivated lately. Just not to blog.
You see, I came to a realization shortly after my last post: I’ve only got so many hours in a day, so I’d better use them as best I can. I love blogging; really, I do! But I love spending time with my family more. I love working on our drafty old house, tilling the garden, seeing some tangible results of my work. For some reason, I am finding myself really hung up on the whole idea of producing things with physical presence. For example, for Christmas I spent hours building the simplest little wooden toy for my son. I’m not a natural and not very experienced at that sort of thing, so it was not easy work. But I found immense enjoyment in it, and the look on his face when he saw it come out of the box was nothing short of priceless.
Perhaps this is why I haven’t been blogging much. Writing is wonderful, but if I’m going to be brutally honest, I’d much rather write science fiction than SQL Server. Please don’t misunderstand me; I love my work and learning about SQL Server. When I’m on the job I eat, sleep, and breathe it. I’d say you’d be pressed to find someone more passionate and focused than I am during those 8-10 hours on Monday through Friday. But when work is done, I want it to be done.
The above picture is something that really had some profound impact on my perspective. For a while I felt like I was floundering in my personal life. Things never seemed to really get done. I had my lists, and I was reviewing them, but I lacked focus. I never felt like I had much time to get things done. So, I decided to see just how much time I really had.
Using a simple Excel sheet, I laid out my week, then blocked out sections in color for things I knew I had to do. Green is sleeping, yellow is work, and blue is meals. And when I saw what was left, I was shocked. My feeling that I never had enough time to get stuff done? Boy was I right. Comparatively speaking, my “discretionary” time (that is, the time during which I pretty much choose what I do) was quite small.
Obviously, short of quitting my job or getting less sleep (and believe me, you don’t want to see me in zombie mode), there was no way to increase the time available to me. So instead, I chose to be more deliberate with how I spend what time I have. I sat down and thought long and hard about what is important to me. After awhile, I came up with a list, and while work and SQL Server were definitely on there, they weren’t as high up as I’d have thought. So, I made the conscious choice not to write on this blog, while doing other things.
That word, “conscious”, is a very important one. Whereas in previous hiatuses, the lack of postings was more about my lack of motivation, this one was more about doing what was important to me. And I hope that in sharing this, I might encourage others to do the same. J.R.R. Tolkein famously wrote “All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” So, if you find yourself mindlessly wandering through your personal life, as I did, stop wandering, and start deciding.
Now don’t fret, dear reader, for I am not abandoning this blog. I’m still going to write, even about SQL Server! But at the same time, I’m going to spend a good bit of time on other things, like writing that novel that’s been sitting at one chapter for over a year now, or tending to my garden (because c’mon, who doesn’t love fresh-from-the-ground veggies?). I hope you’ll stay with me, because I do think I’m still going to write interesting stuff; just a little more diverse than previously. I’m going to work on getting category-specific feeds up, so if you like, you can just subscribe to those that interest you. I also plan on trying to write a few articles for the likes of SQL Server Central or Simple Talk.